merlino41

Thu, 28 Apr 2005 22:16:51 GMT

I know i haven't writen in this thing in a million years but i feel that i need to write this down so i can remember what i think happened... today in science class i was feeling dizzey but i thought nothin of it but then my sight was really weird it was blurry and my hearing was really weird all i heard was like the teacher's voices from like charlie brown that is all i heard that's how everyone talked... and it was really slow everything was in slow motion... then i felt like i fell asleep but really i passed out! holy shit! i could hear the chair fall to the ground but i thought nothing of it cause i couldn't feel myself hit the ground and bang my head... then i herd mr pierce say hurry get the ice packs from the planing room and i woke up scared to death! mr pierce was all it's okay stay still don't move the nurses are coming... I WAS SO LIKE LOSE I HAD NO IDEA I BLACKED OUT! i finally got up and got into a wheel chair and when i turned to see where megan was she was hunched over the desk about to pass out herself! it was the scariest thing i think i have ever like done and i just thank god that mr pierce was there and not mrs euler cause she would have left me DIE!

hope you are better megan! and thanks michele for actually caring unlike custer who laughed at me!

><M3RL1N0

Sat, 26 Mar 2005 21:13:50 GMT

hello children of the world! i'm at ryan's house *the hott one as cortney would say!* lfnsdjkgbshbsdfjkgbjkasdf i'm so god damn bored sprong break SUX major anus! well gottttta go fkfsfngjkdfgs!

><M3RL1N0

...>

Fri, 25 Mar 2005 16:51:20 GMT

wow! i havent updated in a million years! so umm yeah! but nothing exciting happens to me so you didn't really miss much! and like yeah most people have like a million things to say in this live journal thing and like my enterys are like this long ---> <------------> and everyone elses is like this long---> <---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> umm okay i think i'm done oh and my live journal sucks ass cause it's like retarded looking and everyone else has like a cool set up with pics okay yeah well i'm done oh and im me on skifreak41 cause ... just do it!

>< M3RL1N0

djifd hubggsdgs

Sun, 20 Feb 2005 21:12:33 GMT

welp today i went to ccd! *yawn* and i talked to trevor and caroline and steph and airrick... and then i got out early and went to my cousins grandmas house (nancy) and we went to the FLEA MARKET (me,nick,shawn,ryan's mom,slug-o) omfg it was soo funny and then we went to the chines buffet and put sause and shit in shawns water! ha ha it was soo great! then we bought a million things of silly string and faught in the street!!! ahhhhhh! now we are at ryan's house and i'm listening to korn! fuck yeah!!!

M3RL1N0

pshh...

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:05:47 GMT

i haven't wrote in a while so here is my eventful life (you didn't miss anything)
friday* me and custer went to robinson mall and saw some lesbo goths wtf!
saturday* me and custer went skiing with ski club it was soo fun!
sunday* i went to ccd and i was god in our play thing! and then ryan came over for dinner and we prank phone called people! it was sooo damn funny ha ha megan and airrick... then ryan and me talked about stuff that will remain unsaid... then i called airrick and we pranked custer as micheal jackson! and yeah
monday* i hate mondays they are so shity and to top it all off it's fucking Valentines day... fuck that shit... valentines day is some fucked up holiday that some fuck head made up wen he was bored! like seriously! then i went to act one and all my troubles seemed to leave me... but as soon as i walked out of that fucking place... i started thinking about shit again, christ for the past 3 or 4 days i feel like everyone is mad at me or just don't care and they all want me to fucking die!!! i sware my mom hates me and omfg i don't know what to do i just have this feeling in me that everyone wants me to die and that i shouldn't really be here... like i should just stay home and lock myself in my room and not make any connact with anyone! christ! well maybe if i go and play my guitar i'll forget all this bull shit but i doubt it! ... i'm learning how to play "down with the sickness" ... bye for now...

<333 your depressed.confused.friend... M3RL1N0

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 20:51:18 GMT

day was boring as fuck again! there is a dance on friday and i an't going i wish megan wasn't babysitting but she is damn! i was gonna have some ppl over but, i guess i can't...
homeroom: oh sub was a bitch
1st period english_ she got mad cause we didn't do our homework...
2nd period: spanish- i wrote all this shit on my hand cause mrs taylor is boring
3rd period: math- the sub is a bitch and like we didn't do shit... just talked to megan and kt.
4th period: social studies- i wrote a note
5th period: science: me and megan and jake did this thing and presented to the class and megan told mr pirce that i am darkvator now and mr pirce was like yeah wen did that happen... lol
6th period: lunch- we relived childhood meriories... i broke in the year book of cassler in 3-4 grade... omfg ... lol it was great
7th period: music- airrick wanted to fuck custer and he was playintwith that pocket on my back pack... okay? lol and me stephani and mrs mckiney... were making fun of stephani lol it was sooo funny
8th period: me and custer are doing asesame st. mobile... yay
9th period: health- we did poems! yay
bus: me and allison talked always fun

well see you people later

><M3RL1N0

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 00:23:32 GMT

skool
homeroom: nothing
1st period: english- we have no rights!
2nd period: spanish- fuck spanish
3rd period: math- me megan and kt worked on our homework...psh yeah right we just sat there and talked about being coo goths and ghettoes!
4th period:social studies_ i was very depressed and i drew all over my notes and wrote out lyrics to sad and lonley songs...
5th period science- we learned about babies!! yay how exciting...
Mr. perice_ there is nothin that i can think of in comparison to seeing my children being born.
me: it's like a good piece of pie... *silence*
)))))
megan: cassler is a good friend (something like that)
me:what passest you to say that...
Megan: BIRTH CANAL
mr.perice: i don't even wana know!
6th period: lunch- it was very boring today... cassler wasn't there and me and custer sat there and spanky and megan talked to other ppl and not us! *cries*
7th period: music/study hall- we visited mrs.mckiney! and me custer mrs.mickiney and mr krider (principal) had a very interesting conversation on the POPE!!!... then we went to study hall and sat...
8th period: art- i fell asleep cause mr herb is soooo boring!!!
9th period: health- we learned about dating violance and then me and spanky hun gin the hall way for like 10 minutes...
bus home: me and allison talked about some people... you will never know who!!! hahhhh

well that's it today was fucking boring but, I WORE MY PANTS!

>< M3RL1N0

day

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 22:01:04 GMT

today was like blahh... first me and my mom fought over those damn pants then... i cleaned my room and the fucking bathroom... then we fought over the pants again... then i went to cheney's house for my red tips! they are hawt!!! omg! and now i'm just sitting at home doing nothing... i wanted to go see boogyman but i don't think i am ... damn!!! and i'm fucking pissed at ryan cause he won't answer the damn phone! well, i'm gonna go find something to do with my life... and expect to see those fucking pants on monday!!!

<333 M3RL1N0

B 0 R 3 D

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 20:43:58 GMT

Your gender: female
Straight/Gay/Bi: straight
Single? - YES
Birthdate: 4/9/91
Your age: -13
Age you act: idk
Age you wish you were: 21 baby
Your height: -5'7
Your weight- no clue
Eye color: - blue
Happy with it? – sure
Hair color: - brown, with red tips
Happy with it? – Chyea
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous: - righty
Your living arrangement: - my house....
Your family: - mom and 2 brothers
Have any pets? – 1 fish and 1 cat
Whats your job? – none
Piercings? 2 in the ears
Tattoos? – no
Obsessions? – Johnny depp, pirates
Addictions? none
Do you speak another language? – kind of spanish (psh who am i kiding)
Have a favorite quote? – *but why is the rum gone?*
Do you have a webpage? – no
Deep Thoughts About Life and You in it: it fucking sux my mom cares to much about my looks!
Do you live in the moment? – sometimes but i'm usaly out of it
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others? – no
Do you have any secrets? – oh yeahh
Do you hate yourself? – FUCK yes
Do you like your handwriting? sure
Do you have any bad habits? –idk
What is the compliment you get from most people? idk
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called? Hell
What's your biggest fear? nothing i'm fearless... excpet for dieing!!
Can you sing? – matbe?
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool? no
Are you a loner? no i don't think so
What are your #1 priorities in life? acting
If you were another person, would you be friends with you? sure
Are you a daredevil? - wen i feel like it
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?- i just hate myself
Are you passive or agressive? - ...
Do you have a journal? – yea...a livejournal
What is your greatest strength and weakness? – idk
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'D CHNAGE BEING UGLY SOME HOW I'D GET PRETTY
Do you think you are emotionally strong? some times
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life? yes
Do you think life has been good so far? at times except for last year :-(
What is the most important lesson you've learned from life? don't trust no one
What do you like the most about your body? NOTHIN I"M AN UGLY FUCK
And least? EVERYTHING
Do you think you are good looking? FUCK NO
Are you confident? – sometimes

Sat, 05 Feb 2005 03:13:56 GMT

today me kremer julie and cheney went to the mall and i bought a pair of chained pants to see how i liked them, and i liked them!! see i don't wana fucking worship satin i just like thier style! CHRIST mom leave me the fuck alone! why do you fucking care how i dress let me fucking be what i wana be!!! FUCK YOU WORLD!!!!

>< M3RL1N0

*megan i need your help please tell me what to do!!!!!!! *

today

Thu, 03 Feb 2005 21:13:35 GMT

homeroom: i did all my fucking homework! yay me!

1st period: we wrote shit!
2nd period: spanish... i fucking hate you mrs taylor go die!
3rd period: math megan wasn't there so it was boring as hell...
4th period: i was like drugged on fucking tylnol...
5th period: owl puke wtf!!! megan wasn't there so it was fucking shit agian!
6th period: luch the best part of the day... custer, cassler, spanky! we talk about all that fucked up shit! if cassler was the pope or the president we would all die!
7th period: MASH! custer wtf! fuck the tissues! lol what if i was your sub... *i'd worship you! dude i like this kid... but he raped custer for the fucking tissues!
8th period: i cut myself again!! and watched it bledd and i laughed! lol idk y i jsut think it's funny! **blood is a pretty color lmfao it's not pretty it's coo!**
9th period: Spanky you didn't come to get me out of health class! damn it!!!! oh well tomarrow! me and you will skip like 20 minutes

ACT ONE TODAY! 6-8... shoot me now! i'm so tierd

<333 M3RL1N0

youjustdon'tF()CK1NGC4R3~

FUCK

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 22:06:55 GMT

Today i didn't go to school because our 8th grade ccd class had to go to go to a reteat thing so we could learn about confermation...and the 1st thing we played the helen keller game...omfg it was so funny cause we played that game all day long with custer! then you no we learned about some fucking oil shit! wtf and then we went to a chaple thing to MEDITATE... pshh yeah right me and steph played with our cell phone and the lady hit steph and was like "it's PRAY time NOT PLAY time!" lol stupid old nun! christ! then we had luch ... we played the helen keller game again! omg it was so fucking retarded! then you know we did more holy shit and went to the church and me and custer and mary and steph and caroline got in trouble cause we said amen to loud and long! wtf fuck that lady!!! we didn't do shit!well that was my shity day! and no one fucking cares! so i'm gonna go write again i guess tomarrow ... if anyone cares...

<333 M3RL1N0

BORING

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 01:32:52 GMT

hello people... my life is soooooooo fucking boring!

Home Room:
it was so fucking boing as usual but i did my math homework so i wouldn't get eaten!
1st Period:
me and cortney passed notes and actually did homework for once...
2nd Period:
Mrs.Taylor triied to give us all saturday's psh what a bitch and we changed seats so now me and custer have to scream across the room!
3rd Period:
Math...i hate math sooooo fucking much mrs euler can just die! i sware... once again i look over at megan and she is like spazing and pretending to kill mrs euler... NOthing new!
4th Period:
omfg i was so confused like we talked about jackson and hand grandes and horse shoes and omg i was like wtf and the teacher thinks i'm like metaly retarded! lol
5th Period:
dicected owl puke...again... megan made fun of me cause like i won't touch it and i was freaking
6th Period:
lunch! funness! me and custer and cassler were talking about what our parents would do to us if we got pregnate or if (cassler)got some one pregnate! and that was our happy conversation!
7th Period:
We played MASH all period for me custer and megan! our futures SUCK!
8th-9th Period:
We watched a play thingy on goerge washington and made fun of the art teacher that looks like a hobit! and like there was a french dude in the play and he ROCKED MY SOX! GO FRENCHIE!!!
After Skool:
WEnt to set srike.. loads of fun let me tell you! psh
Dinner for my grandmothers birthday! fun fun fun!

TOmarrow... no achool church thingy! :/ pshh... how fun!

<33 Merlino

>

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 02:14:40 GMT

The tears built up inside her, and never let go…
She held it inside behind her smiles…
But, every once and a while it would show.
She could go one for miles,
But the pain, the suffering, the torment, the woe just would not let go.
Others try to help her, but the wretchedness of her life was not understandable to the other.
The only time she was ever happy was when she was with the one person who cared for her the most.
But once that person left her, there was no one else there that loved her…
Even though there was her family, and friends…
She suffered in the strangest way; to the point were no matter what nothing can help her got over the agony.
As life went on… she thought she had begun to accept it, but it was still stabbing her in the heart!
Life is life, death is death…
But life must go on, She also began to like people around her, like more than just as a friend, but the rejection stabbed her again…
I wish he were still here…
He’d help me through this… but then again if he was here then, almost none of this pain would exist...><

(YOUletitBUILDupINSIDEandnowithinkisthetimetolettheTORMENTout)

<333 Merlino...

you might think i'm the happest person alive...but your wrong i just never showed you my pain...i might seem stupid to let it out now...but i just couldn't do it in the year that it happened...and most of you have no idea what i'm talking about...but if you do...then i just hope you'd understand...that this pain will never go away...and now i feel stupid for posting this in my live journal...and now i feel stupid cause no one cares...and now i feel stupid cause i ramble on about my pain wen there are other people in this world that have bigger problems, but he was the biggest parts of my life!

ndsjkfbakg

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 00:05:52 GMT

yesterday i went skiing with ryan... omfg he is such an ass on the slopes... well in general! but any who! he was spraying snowboarders and shit omg i was crying i was laughing so hard! cause everyone he sprayed was all fuck you buddy and omg you had to be there! and then today i went to act one with cheney! and we did some junk for the seussical so yeah! well i'm gonna go ttul!!

<3Merlino

blahhh!

Sun, 30 Jan 2005 04:47:02 GMT

well i went to that stupid cast party and my fucking hit list just keeps getting longer and longer! i sware some people should just like nfjkdsbndsmgdf,mg! like seriously they just piss me the fuck off! but any ways i was freaking out at the dj at the party cause he played fucking spice girls! okay! WTF! but we danced to ice ice baby!... lol i still think he's hott! omg you ppl think i'm fucking crazy! (just lose it) i love fat, chris, fizzy, sara, cheney, kremer... and MEGAN!! do do do well i have no life and it's late and i'm going skiing with ryan tomarrow!! (after ccd :() but non the less it is skiing and it's with ryan! so it should be hell! yayy! you people are all gonna be like shut the fuck lena no one wants to hear bout your shitty life!! ahh die! and i agree! so i'm gonna go... yeah!

<333 M3RL1N0

shit i forgot something ... and bugsy malone 3

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 16:13:38 GMT

Bugsy malone 3: we rocked the house man!

The other thing from last night!:
last night there were a million ppl there for me my grandma, lynn, steve, ryan, mom, joe, nick, renee, my other grandma, aunt, steve, joyce, ect!... and wen we went to TGI fridays i got balloons from... MY BROTHER JOE! the card said "lena, you did great and da would have been proud! love you big brother joe!" omg i was like gonna cry! like it might not seem like a big deal to you ppl but comming from joe i was gonna cry! ....

(me and fat doing the can can in the parking lot! hells yeah!)

<333 M3RL1N0
((ANGELO))

bugsy malone 4

Sat, 29 Jan 2005 14:24:37 GMT

LAST night was like so great! once again we did wonderful and i love most of you cause right now i'm like pissed at a select few of you! but that's okay any who!! ryan came to the show!! yayyy! and he was all dngvjksdghjkf and i was all ndjakfbhsdjg and i love fat! dude we danced on the parking lot at fridays again! it rocked and like me and fat square danced and me and kt faught and i was flashing the camera it was rocking!!! i love ches!!! you rock my sox baby! and i still miss you megan!!! like a lot!! and finilly!!!!!! me and custer and mary and sam we being total asses and stuff at fridays but it was fun cause mary's brother rox!!!!! well g2g

<3 M3RL1N0
((ANG3L0))

Bugsy Malone 2

Thu, 27 Jan 2005 20:44:58 GMT

today was another day of bugsy malone... we kicked ass!!! thanks for cheering will! dude playing a dude is like SO MUCH FUCKING FUN! i love all of you guys!! you rock! and i love my other people that arn't in the play lots too!! well i think i'm gonna get ready for my next show tonight so i will see you all later!! love ya!

<3 M3RL1N0
(ANF3L0)

Bugsy Malone 1

Wed, 26 Jan 2005 21:33:21 GMT

Today was our first proformance for bugsy malone! it was fun! and we did good!! super infact... maybe!I LOVE playing a gangster! it is like so much fun!! although i wish we did something were you could build your character better... but that's okay! any ways I LOVE IT! except that i have a crap part like line wise but that's okay too! :-P well i guess i'm gonna go do something with my life since for once i don't have any play practice!... although i just don't know what me and cheney are gonna do tomarrow cause we have act one so... i guess we will figure it out! well i'm gonna go!

<3 M3RL1N0 (ANG3L0)

I.N.S.I.D.E.! I !C.R.Y

Mon, 24 Jan 2005 02:45:13 GMT

CCD was cancled!
Went to the movies!
Went to megan's!
>< <3 ><

i don't know what to do with my life any more there is something i need to say but it's like taking a stab in the heart! I don't want anyone to hurt! But, because i'm involved in this some one is bound to get hurt, no one can leave the game untouched! i just don't know any more! *stabs* I wish i knew what to do!! :(

>< M3RL1N0
:/ depressed :(

BORED

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 14:42:01 GMT

Omg life is so damn boring i wish i knew why it was though... do do do i guess we will never no! omg i sware there are like 3 people in this world that i wish would just like die or something!! like just get them out of my life!!! *sneeze*(ryan,brandon,aaron) omg did that slip out... oh well now you know! omg life is so djkhdkjfgbasksadf! and like yserday i was all grrrrrrrrr! leave me alone and then last night was better!!! justin brightned up my day! and any ways i'm just gonna go find something to do with my life! :-/ theres not much to do though! i think i'll bild a snow man... or not! no i will then i'll murder him!!!! lol i did that last year! loads of fun!!! well yeah i'm going to do it so... i guess i'll write later!!!

<3M3RL1N0

<3justin

take it please!!

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 01:43:19 GMT

01. Who are you, what's our relationship?:
02. How and where did we meet?:
03. What's my middle name?:
04. How long have you known me?:
05. Tell me one good thing about myself?:
06. When you first saw me, what was your impression?:
07. My age:
08. Birthday:
09. My favorite band at the moment:
10. Colour eyes:
11. Do I have any siblings?:
12. Have you ever had a crush on me?:
13. What's one of my favorite things to do?:
14. Do you remember one of the 1st things I said to you?:
15. Describe me in 3 words:
16. Name 5 things I love:
17. Do you think I'm good looking?:
18. How would you describe me to someone?:
19. Would you ever date me?:
20. Tell me one thing you've always wanted to say but never did:
21: What do you like most about me?:
22: If we could spend a day together, what would we do?:
23: Have we ever gotten in a fight?:
24: Do you think we will be friends for at least 3 or 4 more years?:
25. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it:
26. What do you think my weakness is?:
27. Do you think I'll get married?:
28. What makes me happy?:
29. What makes me sad?:
30. What reminds you of me?:
31. If you could give me anything, what would it be?:
32. When's the last time you saw me?:
33. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?:
34. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?:
35. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal/Blurty and see what I say about you?:
36. If I was an ice cream flavor, which would I be and why?:
37. What song (if any) reminds you of me?:
38. If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?:
39. Would you make a move on me?:
40. Do I cross your mind at least 1 time a day?:

(i love justin)

Cleaning Out My Closet >

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 21:58:33 GMT

omg! today i had to clean out my closet and my mom was all like omg why are you getting rid of this cute thing and i'm like cause i don't ware that mom! and she was all raaaaaaaaa! she like hates my style and just like me in general... my brothers do to cause like joe is all your gonna cut yourself and hang yourself with your shoe strings and all that shit! i sware my whole family hates me!! EVERYONE FUCKING HATES ME! holy christ!! leave me alone mom it's my life style!

"I'm sorry ma ma i never met to hurt you, i never ment to make you cry, but tonight i'm cleaning out my closet!"

>< M3RL1N0
(i stole the number thing from megan cause she's cool like that!)

...>

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 16:39:47 GMT

hello all... it's snowing! yay! but sadly no ski trip! FUCK! oh well... i'm just gonna sit here all day in this spot online so if you wana talk... please do cause i'm gonna be really bored!!!

<3always merlino